The Antidote to Rumination

On Flow

I’m standing over a 130-yard shot into the green on a tough Par 5. To stay in the playoffs and move on to the next hole, I need to stick this shot pretty close for my partner to have a chance to sink the putt.

All eyes are on me.

Thirty golf carts are surrounding the green as people watch the playoffs of the member-guest golf tournament I was playing with my friend.

My heart is beating out my chest.

A brief mental image of me chunking the shot 10 yards crosses my mind.

I take a few deep breaths using the psychological exhale I’ve learned as a tool for anxiety.

I step up. Flush the shot. It lands within 10 feet of the pin and stops on a dime.

Golf claps.

I exhale and fist pound my buddy.

Whew.

We came in fourth out of roughly 40 teams, and there were a number of moments like this throughout the weekend.

Once I got home late each night after the dinner and socializing, I noticed my brain was quiet.

All that rumination about my ex-girlfriend, all that stress about upcoming work tasks, all that loneliness that tends to creep into my bones on the weekend nights, it was silent.

The day after the tournament was over, I spent some time thinking at a coffee shop while I tried to come up with the next post idea.

I was having trouble because I typically write about topics freshly on my mind—some new tool I learned for anxiety, some new mindset shift from therapy, some experience that showed me a valuable lesson.

Instead, my mind was quiet after spending three days fully engrossed in this tournament.

And then it hit me: flow state.

I was in the flow state these last few days, so engaged in the tournament that I lost track of time and almost everything else.

When I’m in a flow state, the stress and anxiety from my daily life seem to melt away.

Depending on the topic I’m writing about, I can also get into flow when I’m writing.

If I want to get out of my head, I need to build more flow into my life.

This morning, the rumination is back. It always comes back. But now I know what quiets it. And I’m going to be more intentional about making space for it.

What activities get you into a flow state? And what does that feel like to you? I’d love to hear in the comments.